The Purity Myth” by Jessica Valenti
“A woman’s worth lies in her ability — or her refusal — to be sexual. And we’re teaching American girls that, one way or another, their bodies and their sexuality are what make them valuable.
A world that could peg me as a bad person for sleeping with a high school boyfriend while ignoring my good heart, sense of humor, and intelligence.
The purity myth in America underlies more misogyny than most people would like to admit. Women are led to believe that our moral compass lies somewhere between our legs.
It seems to me;
Boys who have gotten lucky will call the girl a slut and whore while bragging at the same time about his sexual promiscuity. I was lucky and unlucky and did not find love in High School. When I did lose my virginity, I planned it, and proceed to rid of it almost mechanically. I did not see marriage in the future anytime soon and thought now that I am grown and on my own, it was time to become a woman. Today I am lucky enough to enjoy a very satisfactory sex life with my husband, with no worry of infidelity from either him or myself. So far anyway… after 15 years. Our positive Sexual confidence has been key to our successful relationship. Too many married couples have hang ups in my opinion.
My 12 year old daughter is gorgeous and will struggle with boyfriends unlike me. We have already had discussions and I told her she is the one in control. I did not tell her sex was bad, but I did warn her of the double standard, and other dangers of sex. I told her the longer she can wait the better. No sex is safe sex for teens. I am sure this discussion is far from over and will be sure she feels she can come to me for anything.
In my experience in the Navy a female sailor was either a Bitch if you didn’t put out or a Slut if you did.
I remember the big ta do over the “don’t ask no tell” policy about gays in the Military. I remember talking about this with fellow male sailors and how most of them were creeped out that a guy would be looking them over in the shower. I laughed at them; said women are used to being looked over all of the time. They can too. A look but don’t touch policy so to say.
“A woman’s worth lies in her ability — or her refusal — to be sexual. And we’re teaching American girls that, one way or another, their bodies and their sexuality are what make them valuable.
A world that could peg me as a bad person for sleeping with a high school boyfriend while ignoring my good heart, sense of humor, and intelligence.
The purity myth in America underlies more misogyny than most people would like to admit. Women are led to believe that our moral compass lies somewhere between our legs.
It seems to me;
Boys who have gotten lucky will call the girl a slut and whore while bragging at the same time about his sexual promiscuity. I was lucky and unlucky and did not find love in High School. When I did lose my virginity, I planned it, and proceed to rid of it almost mechanically. I did not see marriage in the future anytime soon and thought now that I am grown and on my own, it was time to become a woman. Today I am lucky enough to enjoy a very satisfactory sex life with my husband, with no worry of infidelity from either him or myself. So far anyway… after 15 years. Our positive Sexual confidence has been key to our successful relationship. Too many married couples have hang ups in my opinion.
My 12 year old daughter is gorgeous and will struggle with boyfriends unlike me. We have already had discussions and I told her she is the one in control. I did not tell her sex was bad, but I did warn her of the double standard, and other dangers of sex. I told her the longer she can wait the better. No sex is safe sex for teens. I am sure this discussion is far from over and will be sure she feels she can come to me for anything.
In my experience in the Navy a female sailor was either a Bitch if you didn’t put out or a Slut if you did.
I remember the big ta do over the “don’t ask no tell” policy about gays in the Military. I remember talking about this with fellow male sailors and how most of them were creeped out that a guy would be looking them over in the shower. I laughed at them; said women are used to being looked over all of the time. They can too. A look but don’t touch policy so to say.

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